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Journal

I actually had a life today!

Yesterday as I mentioned, I didn't eat anything. The reason for that was because I had a reunion to go to. It was for all the people who had gotten blackbelts at the karate studio I use to train at. And the reason why I didn't eat, was so my intestines wouldn't fuck up my going (yeah it's that bad), and gladly they didn't. Though there was some cramping in my large intestines that wasn't pleasing me, but it settled down enough and I was able to enjoy myself.

I did get there a little late, real smart on my part. I'm gonna use some street names, so deal. I knew the road the reunion was on, came to Wetzel Road, because when I worked for the NY State Thruway as a part time toll collector, I'd given people directions to Wetzel Road (correct ones, didn't always do that, oops!), from the toll booth, which was located across from the place the reunion was being held in. It was the 9th road from there, if memory serves. Unfortunately I forgot about one little thing, the road I want to take, is named something different at the intersection with Wetzel Road, so I drove past it. Took the wrong road, realized I wasn't gonna get there the way I was going, so turned onto another road, and ended up back at Wetzel Road, just closer to my house, so I basically drove in one big circle. So went home, checked mapquest, then went back out and went the right way.

When I went in, had people recognizing me right away (Hadn't seen anyone in 4 and a half years), so that was nice. Nice also recognizing people, lol. Some had changed, some hadn't. Two who I knew were kids, or teens, had kids of their own! It's like, geez. Hmm, well I mingled for a bit, before dinner was served. Actually got to sit with some people I knew, so that was nice. Though it would have been nice if I got there sooner so I could have done more mingling, but there was mingling time after dinner, which was good. Some people might have left right away though, so that bad.

Anyway, one thing I remember, was when I was at the karate studio, I gave out gum to the kids there, and I was thinking, heck, I better bring some gum just in case, though it having been 4 and a half years I doubted anyone would actually ask for gum. Well while I was at dinner, or semi after dinner, a kid comes up, about 13 I think, and asks if I remembered him, I didn't that well, but he mentioned how I was always giving out gum to the kids, and said he was one of the kids, and then during the conversation asked if I had any, I said I did and gave him a piece. So that was kinda neat, or cute as one of the moms said. But he really seemed interested in me, and we had some conversations throughout the night, and I tried to explain my health issues to him. He wanted to know, lol.

He had also come up with someone else, who was little when I last saw him, and damn! He had grown. I remembered him better because I knew his sister and family, and had been to their house, which gives the mind more to remember a person by. The interesting thing is the relationship I had with his sister had kinda soured though. When I had last saw her, she gave me this attitude like she hated me, which ya know, sucked. So I didn't try talking to her sister at all, until the end, when she was leaving. I decided what the heck, why not just say hi? Glad I did, because she seemed happy to see me, and such, so maybe it was just girl teenager stuff that had given her the attitude, and now she had grown out of it. She was a mom too now, which is like wow. The only regret I now had was a friend of her's, who I guess you could call a first love, though I really didn't love her, I was just really depressed at the time and she had messed with my head and been nice to me, so I thought I loved her, I never said hi, because things had soured with her too. I regret not saying hi now, because the other girl was nice, and maybe she would have been nice as well. Oh well, no other regrets at least, and quite happy I went.

After everyone had finished eating, they had people speak. Mostly just talking about memories, and funny experiences that were had. There was some roasting of the head instructor, and others, and brought back a lot of memories for me. There was even a slide show with pictures, which was really nice, seeing things I had missed, not so nice, but seeing things I remembered, was nice.

Still sorta amazing how the kids I knew had grown up. One girl who was at the table I was sitting at, and I was sitting next to her sister, was still the nutty full of energy girl she was, just a bit more mature in some of the things she said.

I'm not quite sure what else to say, I had a great time. It was really nice to be having a life again for once, despite the things I had to put my body through to enjoy it. Hmm.. I dunno, guess I gotta make sure I don't get depressed now, since I got a taste of what life use to be like, lol. Shouldn't happen, just trying to remember the good times, and be happy I got to go. Think I am maturing in that way.

Hopefully.

And heck, hopefully my test results will get back soon, say I have Celiac Disease, and I can then make the lifestyle changes I need to make to get healthy. This experience tonight, was the perfect thing to help motivate me, when it's time.

So, again, glad I went. =)

Posted by Me on 6/12/2004 11:45:58 PM | Comments?

Blogger thinks it's freaking funny.. I wanted to log in and complain about how slow Live Journal usually is for me, and how much a pain in the butt I consider it to be, and guess what happens? Blogger wouldn't let me log in!

Joy.

Hmm.. don't have much else to say, haven't had anything to eat today besides some starbursts (gotta keep blood sugar up!), so thinking isn't on my to do lists right now.

Posted by Me on 6/11/2004 11:43:11 PM | Comments?

Why do I have the feeling of like a nervous breakdown coming on? Well.. it's not as bad as it was earlier, and maybe not a nervous breakdown, just the need to run away screaming.. unless that's the same difference, lol.

Posted by Me on 6/11/2004 01:04:39 AM | Comments?

Had a lovely afternoon. Wanted to get things done, but I also decided to get on AOL.. d'oh. One person I knew was upset that she didn't get a job she really needed. The temp place doesn't tell her anything when she calls, just that they'll call her back, then never do. So she was feeling pretty down, saying how she was giving up on it. I was trying to tell her to keep calling, and if that didn't work, to go down to the place and politely demand an answer. Not nice of them to continue to string her along like that.. though she thought it'd be no use, because she lives near the Mexican border, and jobs are always been given out to those who sneak across the border for less than min. wage. Great job President Bush! I can blame him, because this is in Texas.. and he use to run Texas, err.. ran Texas into the ground, I mean.

Another person I was talking to, was in an even more fun position. Her niece was missing and had last been seen getting into the car of a known drug dealer and rapist of girls her age (14-15). Wonderful! So I ended up putting more focus on this person, instead of the first.. kinda felt bad about doing that, since it seemed first person was upset too. Though 2nd person had a more serious matter. So I got nothing done I had planned on doing.. but, eh.. I'm not complaining, too much.

I did call the first person, later after she had signed off and I was done with the 2nd person, to see if she was okay. Got voice mail, left a message, though she didn't call back. Was expecting her too, just told her she could if she needed to talk.

Ugh.. I worked out my forearms this evening, and damn.. they be sore, and it's making typing feel real good! But that seems minor compared to the situations above.

Posted by Me on 6/11/2004 12:03:14 AM | Comments?

Wow oh wow am I still up? Gawd, I should have gone to bed hours ago! And yes I do realize posting here to complain about not being in bed, when I could easily turn off the computer and go to bed, is a tad not sane. Though.. just don't feel like going to bed! I don't think I'm making sense.. think I need sleep.

Someone just drag me to bed please! And if yer a hot chick who wants to get married (since I'm saving myself), have hot sex with me too!

Riiight.. even I'm finding this post to be lame.

Posted by Me on 6/10/2004 05:25:44 AM | Comments?

So I threw up about 7 times earlier as I mentioned.. and what do I do? Decide to have some Oreo cookies! Then I remembered we had chicken noodle soup, so made some of that. Then I had some popsicles, cuz that makes throwing up taste yummy, and then I had some more Oreos.. I'm a smart one, LOL.

Haven't throw up again at least, haven't felt sick either. Maybe later my stomach will decide it doesn't want food in it again, though I last ate about 4 hours ago. So we'll see, though I kinda wanna eat some more.. argh.

Should I? Hell, it's only throwing up.. something I use to hate with a passion, but it isn't that bad if you aren't nauseous at the same time it seems.. so, really doesn't matter I guess. And if I do end up throwing up more, well then, I got to enjoy food without the weight gain! Err.. yeah, that sounds sane.

Oh well..

Posted by Me on 6/10/2004 02:01:47 AM | Comments?

Can someone please shoot me?

I've thrown up I think 7 times now, in the last hour.. though it did all happen within a 10 minute period, but I still think that counts as separate times. I'm not feeling nauseous either, it's my large intestines that is feeling fucked up.. argh. Kinda like Saturday night, but in different ways, different bad ways. I'm not going into all details again, cuz I'm being nice.. though was throwing up, because my stomach just felt like it didn't want food in it. No like sick feeling, weird.

So, maybe earlier when I was feeling hungry.. I wasn't. Stomach sorta felt unsettled like it wanted food in it, but I guess it changed it's mind.

Anywho, that's it.. wanna post on a message board about how my health has been behaving, they'll get the grosser details, since someone there might be able to say it happens to them too.. or something.

Why posting here? I dunno, just to share my misery or something.

Posted by Me on 6/09/2004 07:57:06 PM | Comments?

I'm hungry, so I'm gonna go eat something now.. instead of posting. Why post this then? Eh.. felt like it, and was sitting here.. so why not? It's a nice time waster for the readers!

Later!

Posted by Me on 6/09/2004 05:08:52 PM | Comments?

Damn.. I opened up blogger to post something, then decided to answer an email instead, and now that I'm back here.. I have no clue what I wanted to post about. Why am I posting? Well, might as well since I already have this thing all open and ready to do so. Wouldn't be nice to poor ol' blogger if I didn't post, that'd be like teasing!

Oh well.. usefulness to the extreme!

HEY! I just remembered, and don't feel like deleting the part above, because. Just because. Anyway, today I finally just sat down, turned off the TV, didn't sign online, and tried to get started on the book I've been wanting to write. I spent about 50 minutes, and only got about a page and a half done, in word. Not a lot. I might end up revising most of it anyway, so boy.. this book writing process is really gonna take a long time. Hopefully not though, maybe once I get more into it, it'll flow and come out better. Hopefully at least!

Just need to keep putting time into it though.

Posted by Me on 6/09/2004 01:01:16 AM | Comments?

So I was up to see venus, and it was just great! Well if you ignore the fact that I stayed up all night to see it and the fact I couldn't see it anyway, but those are just the details, and who cares about the details, right?

Kinda knew I was introuble when they mentioned on the news this morning that it's really hard to see with the naked eye.. but least I got to see it on the news.

*shrugs*

Posted by Me on 6/08/2004 07:15:55 PM | Comments?

Hmm.. gonna try a silly survey thing, that I stole from Mem. She in turn stole it from someone else. Not sure how many people will actually respond, but go for it, even if you have no clue who I am. It'll make me feel special! Just respond in my comments section, lol.

1. Who are you?
2. Have we ever met?
3. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
4. Describe me in one word.
5. What reminds you of me?
6. If you could give me anything, what would it be?
7. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?
9. Are you going to put this on your weblog and see what I say about you?
10. What do you love like a fat kid loves cake?
11. What makes you come back here?

There was no number 8, so just skip it or make up something creative if you'd like!

In other news, tomorrow it may get up to 90.. blargh! What happened to the 60's and 70's? At least we now have the AC put in the window of this room, and it's a small room, so all I need to turn is turn it up, close the door, and it gets cold quick. Nice for those hot days! And guess I'll be living in here during the summer.. fun.

Posted by Me on 6/08/2004 01:45:28 AM | Comments?

Tomorro, is the magical day of Venus passing infront of the sun! Err, riiight. Here it is only viewable from sun rise to about 7:30 AM.. so wondering if I really want to see it. May not be able to even see anything, from the sound of it. Though might be interesting none the less?

Oh well.. so considering if I should go to bed and try to get up super early (for me), or just stay up and catch it.. have been staying up to sun rise a bit too often lately, so one more day wouldn't hurt, right?

Hmm..

Posted by Me on 6/07/2004 11:53:41 PM | Comments?

I wanna indulge my inner child for a while, and talk about video games. I do understand this post may end up sounding a bit nerdy too, so you've been warned.

Recently I've been renting games for the x-box since my brother is home from College and his x-box is here. Something I was really started to hate about renting games is that some are broken or just completely suck. It's like a waste of money! Though, have been given rebates for broken games. The last game I rented though, I found something I really hate, renting a game I really like. Why? Well because it's rented and that means you have a limited amount of time to play it! So if you love the game, you have to spend all your free time playing or else you're losing time that could have been spent playing it! And I'm one of those people who can get addicted to something they really enjoy, and it's hard to find the motivation not to play a game when you know the game has to go back in a few days.

Anyway the game I rented was Dynasty Warriors 4, and here's where things are gonna start getting more nerdy, maybe. When I was in highschool and maybe some before and some after, there was this series of games called Romance of the Three Kingdoms for the Nintendo. It's about a period in Chinese History when the Han dynasty I guess fell, and others tried to take over and rule. In the game you basically ran a province, or more than one, and had to build them up and build up your armies and take over all the provinces. I thought it was a fun game. What this has to do with Dynasty Warriors 4, is that when playing the Romanance of the Three Kingdoms games, I always thought it would be neat if you could play as one of the generals and not Kingdom rulers, and well, Dynasty Warriors sorta answers that wish.

If you remember the Three Kingdoms, you'll know the names of the characters in the game Dynasty Warriors. There's; Cao Cao, Liu Bie, Sun Jian, Sun Ce, Sun Quan, Guan Yu, Zang Fie, Sima Yi, Yuan Shao, and many many more. I think I spelled most of those right. It seemed like they got everyone, plus more. There were female characters as well in this one. The purpose of the game is to basically choose a family or "dynasty" that you want to play for, and then you go through scenes that may or may not have been historically correct (remember the wall of fire?). You go through battles, on a battlefield, and the goal is too usually keep your commander safe while killing the other sides commander (A lot of running around is involved, unless you have a horse, lol). Each side usually has some generals with troops. You can have troops too, though they are called body guards and you can have more of them as they gain experience. They get stronger too. Your character as well gets stronger, and you can play as any number of characters (though a lot are locked at first) or a created character, and you build them up as you progress. Basically your character can get to the point where he or she can pretty much fight on his or her own.. on easy, totally, on hard, well you'd need to be more careful, but still possible.

Anyway, I really enjoyed the game.. but I thought of how the game could be made much much better! Take the concept of this game, of how battles are fought and character growth, and combine that with the actual running of Kingdoms that could be found in Three Kingdoms! Now things are gonna get really nerdy, lol.

I think it would be really fun, if a mode in that game, you could create a character, then go to play like a "career" mode found in sport games, lol. First you decide which village you want your character to be from in this mode, then through fighting and doing various things, your character can grow stronger and maybe even gain items, like from stealing or robbing or maybe winning tournaments? As your character grows stronger and gets more known, the Ruler controlling the province your character's village is in, will start trying to recruit you to join him or her. If no one is currently ruling, well then maybe anyone can try to recruit you. These would be computer controlled rulers, I'd say. And of course, your character can travel around China, from village to village, or to larger cities. Once your character is developed enough, you could then decide to join someone and be there general as I mentioned, and you could be then put in charge of an army to run. You get to train and build it up, and if done well enough they could end up being loyal enough to you, that if you ever defect or revolt on your ruler, they would come with you. Though for that to happen, I think your character would need a good amount of fame or some sort of thing that is gained through winning battles and fights (need their respect!). Instead of doing that though, you could just rise up in rank and maybe eventually rule yourself, like if the ruler dies or you somehow assassinate him, without being found out. Sounds fun, maybe? Well if programmed well enough.

Though that's not all! Instead of joining anyone, you could become like a bandit or something, as you become better known for doing stuff, you can raise your out little group of outlaws, and you can raid towns or villages or cities (larger cities being harder with their militias), maybe eventually becoming strong enough to take on the armies of the rulers who will be out to get you, for being an outlaw. Or the bounty hunters or generals sent to kill you. And you could try and rob supply shipments sent by certain rulers, which would make them madder at you. Maybe you could even, if in the right place, be drafted or more like paid to help out the ruler of an area you are in if they are invaded by someone else. You help in the battle, and once it's over, then take your money and keep whatever spoils you won, and go your separate way. More ideas, rulers could offer items to recruit you too, like you could do in the Three Kingdoms games when recruiting generals, or even offer and give items to reward service. Don't like the idea of allowing them to take items, but maybe have an option that if they try to take an item, you can defect, leave, or revolt?

I dunno.. got more idea, like how to make editing characters better, and I like how a character can be used in any scene, as in Dynasty Warriors, so I think if you are playing a game, don't like it or win it, you could start a new one with the same character, and you get to use any items you earned, though maybe just any fame or etc you got, will need to be re-earned. Maybe.. but, heck, I think doing something along these lines, could make a really kick ass game! And of course, you could always just play as a current ruler, like in Three Kingdoms, but I was explaining a real fun game mode.

Oh yes, just thought of some more things. Like in Dynasty your character has a certain weapon he or she starts out with, and gets better with it, but should be allowed to use others too. They'll just need to gain experience using those as well. Also, you should beable to get really powerful as a character! Should beable to gain higher weapon and character levels, unlike in Dynasty, maybe even with enough work, get a character that is nearly invincible? Or just really harde to defeat and could take on armies by his or herself! LOL.. dreaming.

So, anyway.. inner child has been indulged, and hopefully that wasn't too nerdy? If any game company person read this, liked it.. I'm willing to let you use the idea, as long as I get to be a designer! Well, idea designer, I couldn't do any actual computer, graphic design, lol.. and I wouldn't ask for a ton or money or anything, just what would be considered fair! LOL =)

Posted by Me on 6/07/2004 06:57:53 PM | Comments?

I'm feeling better today at least, not back to normal yet, and things feel like they could get worse if they so wanted, but right now, fingers crossed, knock on wood, I'm feeling better.

Saturday, before getting sick, I saw Bruce Almighty, on HBO and X-men 2, on MAX. Bruce turned out to be more of a romance and trying to teach a lesson movie, than just a comedy. Though I still enjoyed it. Find it interesting too how the movie would show how things that Bruce did could backfire. So guess it had a nice morale to it's story? I dunno, I'm not trying hard to review here, can ya tell?

X-men 2 really surprised me, when wolverine started using his claws to kill people. In everything I had seen of him up till that point, he never actually tried to stab anyone. Or well, try seriously too. I've also wondered why the hell he didn't though, considering they are good weapons, and so he finally started using them. I did enjoy the movie too, it doesn't fit with the X-men I was raised on, being the cartoon that aired on Fox I believe, in the early '90's, but getting past that, movie was enjoyable.

What else? Too bad for Smarty Jones, losing Saturday. Also too bad for Ronald Reagan, dying and such. Though is it really too bad he died? Sounds like he was already dead basically, having lost his mind to Alzheimers, if I spelled that right. That does raise a question, when is someone dead, when the body goes, or when the mind goes? I'm sure it is sad for his family that he died, but his suffering has finally ended too, so that's a good thing. Though I figure they were suffering more, since he was gone mentally. That brings up something else, for shame on the anti-cure to Alzheimers right-wing crazy religious people! Most likely a cure wouldn't have been found in time for Reagan, but certainly in the future one might be found to help save lives and help many many people avoid suffering. But those anti-cure people just can't handle stem-cell research, cuz oh no.. some people might clone others! Grow up idiots, and try to think for once. If someone wants to go into cloning, they will. There will be a place somewhere in the world where they be allowed to, but since your pathetically feeble sheep minds can't figure that out, you'd rather just cut off your noses instead of deal with the pimple. Great thinking! Lets praise you all, for being too simple minded and uncaring to want to prevent millions from suffering. It's so good y'all are here to help keep the world from becoming a better place. I'm sure y'all believe God will reward you for being good little sheep, but since you are all anti-cure, you're murderers, and there won't be room for in Heaven come checkout time.

Feel free to send angry emails kool-aid people! =)

Posted by Me on 6/07/2004 03:16:35 PM | Comments?

I'm feeling just great right now, and this being online, I'll point out that I'm being sarcastic. Not feeling as badly as I did last night at least, but really don't plan on eating anything today, unless I start feeling really better. I'd rather not risk throwing up, or upsetting the other end anymore than it already is.. ugh.. that this isn't feeling good.

Too vague? Thank me.

And to make an updating post, last Saturday, not this past one, but a week ago, ended up playing a good of 2 on 2 basketball in my driveway. That was fun! Well, actually it was, though by the time we started playing, my lungs were already hurting slightly, just from shooting the basketball and not much else. Maybe I'm really out of shape, or being out of shape when you have asthma isn't a good thing, either way, my lungs really started to hurt while we were playing. The teams were, me and my sister's boyfriend, against my brother and his friend. Didn't go too well, my team lost 11-2, first game.. not sure how that happened. Second game was better, we lost 11-9, and could have won I'd think, but by then I was dying and wasn't much help on defense. Besides my lungs killing me, muscle in my leg was cramping up, and I didn't want to push it too hard. All in all though, did have fun. That kind of suffering, I much prefer over the kind I was in last night, and still am in.

What was really good though, is I was sore the next day, but the day after that, I was more or less fine. Usually I end up being sore for a few days at least, and it only really lasted one day. Amazing considering I had done so much more activity than my body was use too. To make matters even better, no muscles seemed to be strained or pulled, which I find amazing as well. So had a good time, and it didn't have as many consequences as my body usually gives, so was worth it.

And with that, gonna go.. cuz, well I'm not feeling good!

Posted by Me on 6/06/2004 06:20:45 PM | Comments?