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Journal

(back dated, reposted from Deadjournal)

Computers suck!

My computer is such a piece of crap, and it's only 2 years old. But it's always liked freezing up too much. For the past hour or so, I've been trying to scan it for virus, got through 75% of the comp's files, then the virus scanner had an error or something and stopped working.. did it again, and the comp froze up!

God.. so I'm trying it again. Hopefully I can get through the scan this time. At last count, I've only found 11 viruses, lol sad.

I blame all those damn pop up ads, I don't DL things I shouldn't!

Posted by Me on 4/13/2002 10:54:00 PM | Comments?

(back dated, reposted from Deadjournal)

Yay! Busy busy, lol.

I think I'm finally making good progress on a website. It won't be up for quite awhile, because I got a program where I can design it all on my comp, then upload it.

Had a friend give me a whole bunch of help too!

So my quest of like 3 years of trying to make a decent website may finally be achieved (I didn't try most of that time). I say decent, not awesome, lol.

Sigh.. lots of work needs to be done though! Not including the work I have from school, and gotta correct papers. Long process.

Back to website building!

Posted by Me on 4/12/2002 05:19:00 PM | Comments?

(back dated, reposted from Deadjournal)

Memories..

I should have posted this Monday, but hey, I'm a lazy bum. :)

After my writing class, I was in this area where the teacher's offices were, there were some other students too, talking about stuff. They were trying to figure out the name of this movie too, and one of the students mentioned how she remembers the movie scared her. Which got me thinking.

I started thinking about movies that scared me when I was little, which wouldn't normally scare someone. I remember at a sleepover at my house, a friend who was staying got nightmares from the movie Stand by Me (There is that dead body part.. scary!). He got scared woke up, and maybe went to my parent's room? I don't quite remember, because I was asleep the whole time, I was even told he stepped on my head, hmm.. maybe that could explain somethings, lol.

Anywho, I remembered getting a nightmare from the movie Chariots of Fire. It's a movie about this runner who has only one leg (Obviously he has an artificially one). But the nightmare I had, was all my pets.. and other animals.. with there legs chopped off, I would like find them on the ground. Then I found my pet snake, but it was all chopped up into pieces. Then something jumped out at me from a garbage can, and I woke up.

Another one that gave me a nightmare, was an episode of Punky Bruster (sp?), yeah, silly huh? In this episode, she is in some sort of haunted cave I believe. I think she came across someone being headless, or people she knew and her dog were, like just their heads, sticking out of the cave walls. It was odd, but still gave me a dream of people or someone being headless, or only a head.

Well enough of my lovely childhood memories, lol.

Posted by Me on 4/12/2002 03:16:00 AM | Comments?

(back dated, reposted from Deadjournal)

I'm a mom!

Well, not actually a mom. First I'm male, second I don't have a kid. What I mean, is that yesterday, oddly.. well maybe not oddly, but it certainly was new, my nurturing side went completely into overdrive! This person I know, well I had just met her that day when I was talking to someone else at school, and she got a paper cut. It was on the area of skin between the thumb and forefinger, very ouchie, it was bleeding too. She might have be over playing it a bit, but I got this huge urge to just grab her hand, hold it, do whatever I could to make it feel better. It was the only real thought in my mind! Gee. I of course didn't considering I just met this person, and didn't want to overstep any bounds. But it was kinda odd, I know I am a nurturing person, but I've never had my nurturing instincts take over like that.

Later in the day, when I was in my office hours for TAing, and also at the class, there was another person who was really stressed out, and upset about it. Again, all I wanted to do was comfort, very strongly! Her, I sorta know, so I was doing the old putting my arm around her half hug thing, and I did ask her if that was alright since some people can get freaked out by that. She wasn't one of those people, and she really didn't feel any better.. but I still tried!

Today, it stuck again as well. Another person who I know in that class, we pulled up into the parking lot at the same times, and got out and talked on the way to the class. She wasn't feeling good, and I just wanted to comfort her with a hug, to try and make her feel better too! I didn't though. But sheesh.. I don't think this is a bad thing, but certainly is different. Hopefully it doesn't get me in trouble, lol.

Anyway, I haven't been posting in this thing everyday like I should be. Hopefully I'll remember to, and have the time. I could complain about somethings, but nothing really new has happened, so I'll end for now.

Posted by Me on 4/12/2002 12:53:00 AM | Comments?

(back dated, reposted from Deadjournal)

Geez!

Does that last entry make me sound pathetic?

Hmmm... it's not like I'm really lonely, only sometimes when things aren't going well, you know?

As for what I said about being hurt and people leaving, that sounds a lot worse than it actually is I think. Meaning, it's only happened a few times. Not all the time. And I've been more the one who did the leaving, hehe. What? If someone stabs you in the back, lies to you, or hurts you and won't at least explain why they did it and acts like it's no big deal, why stay with them?

Some of the relationships (most) were the result of being depressed anyway, and needing someone. Yeah, I use to suffer from that. So that deep sadness caused by that, could cause me to overlook some things about the other person or the situation. Once things want pop, by them doing something like I mentioned above, it was time to face reality. Reality checks can be so much fun. Not! But they are a needed part of life.

I think I may be gainning some wisdom in my old age.

Posted by Me on 4/07/2002 05:05:00 PM | Comments?